So the other day I was at my parents house getting my eyebrows waxed (my mom is my personal esthetician - why you ask? - because you can't beat $free.99!) and as I was laying on her kitchen table (she's quite the professional) she looked down at me and said, "Wow, the circles under your eyes are really dark!" Now, this is something I wouldn't normally share (not one of my proudest moments) but there is meaning to this story that I DO want to share. And just for the record, my mom is notorious for pointing out my physical flaws; like when I'm walking around with a blemish the size of Texas on my
forehead that's obvious to everyone she'll be the one to point it out or when I gained a few pounds in college and we're in the dressing room, "Wow, you really have gotten bigger." thanks mom. (It's alright mom, I ain't mad, I appreciate your honesty most of the time, I just think you're funny. :) ) So needless to say, I wasn't shocked at her honesty but I WAS shocked at the fact that the dark circles under my eyes are so
noticeable to other
people. I wasn't wearing any make-up (concealer is a girl's best friend baby) and that's probably why they stood out to her so much but when I thanked her (sarcastically) for her comment she said, "It's okay honey, life's just hard." Wow, I almost get teary just typing that.
Today in church the message was about abiding in Jesus and being so engrossed in a romantic relationship with him and so filled with joy that our lives should resemble a dance. And as I was sitting there, my mom's comment came to mind. I'm a 25-year-old with dark circles under my eyes. Now, I know I'm not 18 anymore and time takes its toll on your skin but I thought to myself.....I'm letting the world's weight get to me. I'm carrying around the huge burden of life: wondering how we're going to buy groceries, wondering how we're going to pay rent, buy warm clothes for our son, pay off school loans, handle another family death, another family crisis, mend relationships, end relationships, heal wounds, build my marriage, raise my son right, etc. and its all showing up on my face....and I didn't even realize it.......
This story isn't about vanity.....its about joy. And wondering if I've lost the
ability to find joy in my life....... Life is hard. It doesn't get easier. Not with more money, a bigger house, more kids, less kids, a different spouse, perfect credit, or a better job. It's still gonna be hard. I realize that now. My dad always says, "In life, you're always coming out of crisis, in the middle of one, or headed into a new one." And I think that's so true. So, if that is really how life is, where's the hope? Well, the hope is in Jesus and the joy (which is a choice) is in us. Joy is a choice. So, if life's hard, and its always going to be hard, then why not make a point to seek out JOY. The silver lining to every cloud. It's seeing beauty in the snow falling down on my daffodils and hycinth in the middle of April. So what am I going to do? Lighten up. Hand over my burden (aka. life) to God (yet again), wash my hands, smile......and dance.
